emanix: (emanix)
So this just happened.

Background: I'm in the process of redecorating my accidental house in Manchester, including the yard, and having spotted a roll of astroturf outside one of my local carpet shops, marked with a sign saying 'roll end sale', I measured up the space concerned and then wandered in to the carpet shop to make enquiries about size and cost.

I just happen to have my henchman with me. He's hanging back behind me as I wander in, because it's not his house and the purchase has nothing to do with him. Nothing about his body language is saying 'pay attention to me'. Apparently this doesn't matter.

We step through the door and the manager has clearly stepped out for a minute. There are two ladies there, and one asks me if I mind waiting for the boss to get back. I'm fine with that, and about ten seconds later 'the boss' walks back in. A smart-looking middle aged indian man in a suit. The lady I spoke to indicates that there is someone here to see him, pointing at me, so I step forward, expecting the salesman to say hello.

"Hello Sir!" he says peering over my shoulder, to Henchman No.1, who is standing several steps behind me, goggling.

I take a quick glance down at myself to check I haven't suddenly become invisible (nope, there I am, in full stripey-and-spotty chaosbunnific glory). I take another step towards the salesman. Perhaps he's short sighted or something.

"Hi!" I say, rather pointedly, as though he'd spoken to me in the first place.

At this point he literally steps AROUND me to ask Henchman No.1 what he's looking for.
Henchman No.1 is silently shaking his head and pointing at me, and right now I'm getting kinda pissed off, so I march back in front of the salesman and tell him "ME. You speak to ME, please."

Mr. Sexist Salesman did rather grudgingly then proceed to talk to me, but clearly wasn't actually paying any attention to what I said, because while I was asking him about the astroturf I had seen outside, marked as 'roll end sale', he then starts pointing me at carpets inside the store. Carpets that are clearly not roll ends, either.

Wow, sexist carpet salesman, this is the 21st century. Do you seriously mean to tell me that you've never had to treat a woman as a potential client before?

Eventually it turned out that the astroturf was NOT in fact in the sale, so I got the price and sizing availability from him and we left. Unless it turns out that his price is the cheapest source of astroturf in the entire country, I don't believe I will be going back, except possibly to let Sexist Carpet Saleman know how much money I spent with a competing store, and why.

If anyone else feels like calling Carpets World to explain why you also will be giving your money to other carpet stores, they can be contacted here:

Carpets World
787 Stockport Rd Manchester M19 3DL (Levenshulme)
0161 248 0420
emanix: (emanix)
This afternoon I came in to a conversation on facebook inspired by this article: 6 fascinating people who own almost nothing. The conversation wandered into how a lot of the folks who claim to be embracing minimalism and the 'no possessions' lifestyle (and who often seem quite smug and self-satisfied about it) do, in fact, rather carelessly rely on the use of other people's housing possessions to support their lifestyle... something that works in small numbers, of course, but isn't sustainable over a whole population, clearly. There was also plenty of discussion about the lessons these minimalist folk have to teach us. So naturally this conversation got me thinking back over how I have been living my life over the last few months.

I try to be very conscious of when I am and am not relying on other people's kindness. I have been very lucky since I started being nomadic and living out of my backpack, back in March. A lot of people have very kindly offered me their hospitality and even keys to their houses, so despite working out my initial numbers based on staying in hostels and short lets and things, I've been able to save a lot through the generosity of my friends and lovers - and spend it on taking them out for nice dinners instead, or in one particular case, supporting their indiegogo campaign! When I am staying with people I try to give back in practical ways too, such as washing dishes or making meals, making sure the fridge is stocked, doing minor repairs, offering to baby-sit, helping with the bills if bills need paying, that sort of thing. If at some point I forget that there's a give and take there, though, and start getting entitled about it or assuming anyone other than (possibly) the government owes me a place to stay, or pretending I've done it all by myself, do please shoot me!

On the other hand, I think there are ways in which the nomadic lifestyle could be much more sustainable for a lot of people, which perhaps would emerge naturally if enough folks were doing it: there are already plenty of hostels offering dorm spaces and similar for backpackers (even while I was relatively settled in zone 3, I did occasionally ponder moving nearer in to the centre of the city and only paying rent as and when I needed to, given that the daily rate for a hostel in central London was about equivalent to my rent+bills and also included breakfast- but of course there were at the time other intangibles such as stability, and choice over one's housemates to consider, plus storage for the 'stuff' that I was lugging around from house to house with me). I do wonder how the current offering would flourish, change and compete if that market was to grow significantly. Extending it even further, what would the world be like if we were all guaranteed stable housing as and when we needed it, for as long as we needed it, ('at-will accommodation', if you like) and nobody owned property at all?

Speaking of property, one thing that backpacking really does for you as an individual is that it will make you think very hard about every single thing you buy or choose to carry around with you. When every new item you acquire means than something else has to be thrown or given away, buying 'stuff' begins to take on a different light. As an inveterate 'pack-rat', that's been a real eye opener for me, and particularly for folks who tend to horde 'stuff', I'd recommend trying it, even just for a short while.

I hadn't really intended to be nomadic for quite as long as I now have been. My initial intention was to put most of my stuff in storage just for a little while, go travelling to see friends and family for maybe two or three months and then settle down again, but as all of the work I do is non-location-dependent and I am under no particular pressure to stay in one place, the charms of the 'footloose and fancy free' lifestyle have rather drawn me in. When I do pass through London I have found myself rather naturally reducing my possessions in storage by roughly one crate each time I visit, when I look at things and realise I haven't missed them even for a moment. And the less stuff I have in storage, the less inclined I am to settle down and be weighed down by it. It has been a fascinating process.

I do find that I am shocked more than ever, when I walk by shops selling ornaments and suchlike, by the sheer uselessness of so much of what's out there. Tea, however, turns out to be really important to me (nobody who's met me should be surprised by this, yet somehow I was!) and I now make sure I have a small supply in my backpack to be certain that I have it wherever I happen to be, and usually a travel mug tucked in my belt, as well. Books are important to me too, but I have finally given in and gone the kindle route, because there is only so much paper one person can carry.


There is definitely a sense of freedom in knowing that everything you need for your every day life will fit into a backpack or a suitcase. Knowing that one has the option to take off at any moment means one is never at the mercy of a bad landlord or bad relationship, you can do crazy things like leave the country on a moment's notice, because you know you have everything you need with you, or fly south for the winter, which certainly has a tinge of luxury (though living abroad is mostly cheaper than the UK, in fact). In my case, at this particular time, it has also meant that I could up sticks and move to Manchester to spend time looking after my terminally ill grandfather as his health has been deteriorating over the last few months, and stay for as long as I'm needed. It's hard to put a price on that sort of freedom.

It's not for everybody, though: I know that if I was even slightly less physically able than I am right now, I wouldn't be able to handle carrying both my backpack and the 'mobile studio' I built to take around with me in a suitcase. I am dreading the next time my knee gives out and I have to use crutches, as public transport will be a whole different experience. I could be faced with the stark choice of settling down in one place or giving up my art (or being dependent on other people to move my case for me, which... well, let's say it's a last resort!). There are all sorts of reasons one might need to be static, or have more equipment than a person can reasonably carry. And of course if the work I did was location-dependent, there might not be any point to my minimalism. I'm not trying to pretend that the life I live now is easy to arrange, or even possible for everybody.

There have been hard times too. Finding time and space to myself has not been entirely easy. There have been times when my choice has been between offending my hosts or sharing space, and occasionally even beds with people (and pets) I would not normally choose to. Getting ill and needing several days of hardcore rest whilst visiting in a house without a dedicated guest room was... tricky. And if one has kindly been invited in as a guest, turning down that invitation, or backing out of a stay that one had already committed to, and saying to someone "Actually, I'd prefer to go and stay in a B&B or a hotel for a bit so I can get some space to myself", can seem impolitic, and difficult (or expensive) to arrange at the last minute when something hasn't gone to plan.
Not knowing what city one is going to be in next month can get a little exhausting, too, where long range planning is concerned, but the hardest thing I have had to deal with yet has been accessing medical care whilst on the move; something I have found incredibly difficult even as a relatively well off British citizen in stable employment. The NHS as a whole is not at all set up for patients who migrate, even between just two addresses, let alone many. Walk-in and access centres are not well advertised, and often websites are out of date (we turned up at one that was advertised online to find it had closed more than a year ago), and the ones that still exist are often poorly signposted and in obscure places. I find myself struggling to use the exact same sort of facilities I would have to visit if I was sleeping rough on the street, and wondering how (or if) anyone who is homeless through circumstances not of their own choosing actually manages to see a doctor, other than through visits to A&E. As I am dependent on a regular supply of thyroxine tablets to actually keep me alive, and also having had a chest infection for most of the last month on top of this, that's been pretty stressful.

But still, I do feel incredibly privileged and lucky to be able to live and work the way that I currently do. I hope I come across as neither smug nor self satisfied, but I do think there are some very valid lessons to take away from all this stuff... or from the lack of stuff. :)
emanix: (Default)
.

Emanix (noun, fem.): 1. one who emanates. An originator and creator of things. 2. One who puts out.
(The latter not 100% accurate, at least, not to just anybody, but I couldn't resist the pun!)

Polyamorist (n): one whose life is characterised by a set of complex overlapping calendars and scheduling conflicts and, to a lesser extent, multiple loving relationships. (from [livejournal.com profile] bminstrel link)

The latter seems particularly apt for me (apart from a general feeling that the word 'polyamorist' makes something that I feel is an innate part of my identity sound like a career choice - I prefer 'polyamorous person'). Back from a week in Thailand which I left for straight after helping out with Polyday, now recovering from jetlag and looking in despair at a to-do list that stretches on into infinity. Posts will happen though. When I can fit them in between my other scheduling conflicts, that is!

In the meantime, how would you define the meaning of your name or username, if it was up to you?
emanix: (Default)
Wow it's been a busy month! A lot of new friendships, a may-be new relationship, a lot of new ideas, and a lot of running around.

Idea 1. I love Frolicon!

The first of April saw me at Frolicon - utterly fabulous. Great to see a lot of the people I connected with last year again. And also a certain person that I only briefly bumped into last year, we hit it off *very* well, and I got to hang out with a lovely portion of the polyfamily, too. That was lovely! Now engaged in one of several 'Sooper Sekrit Projects' which involve a great deal of awesome... and tentacles! Frolicon makes me very happy, and it is worth a lot to me to keep going back there. Where else could I find such people? Perhaps not quite so appealing to [livejournal.com profile] werenerd - he and jetlag are not good friends, but I think we'll be back - it was also our anniversary party, after all!

Idea 2. Skeptical Tantra.

Barely had time to breathe in London, catch up on work and spend a little time with my other primary before [livejournal.com profile] werenerd and I were off to a Tantra weekend where I yelled at the instructor for spouting sexist drivel, but also was inspired by the challenge of taking what is good and valuable from these practices (and there certainly *are* parts that are good and valuable) and separating it from the pseudoscience and religious babble.
I realise I'm pretty well-placed to do this. I've been studying sex in a casually academic sense for some 20 years*, I have useful knowledge of the real science behind the pseudoscience, and I have worked for and with a tantra school, one of the teachers for which is conveniently a housemate. It's a hell of an undertaking, but the groundwork is there already that would make it possible, and I feel it would be useful to the world. I'm giving this some serious thought.

Idea 3. Rethinking my views on long-distance relationships.

Once upon a time I swore I woudn't ever have another long-distance relationship, mostly based on the fact that every time I have done it's caused me immense stress thanks to partners being not okay with polyamory (often after previously having been fine with it). These days I might flirt with an openly poly person who lived a bit further away, but had been keeping them somewhat casual out of wariness. My experience of poly thus far is that it works better when partners are local. Perhaps, though, if the person(s) concerned are poly activists, it might in fact be worth taking that chance? It's not as if I don't have plenty of long-distance friendships. I still can't see myself taking on a new relationship with a person that isn't already poly, though. I just don't have that kind of energy these days. One policy change at a time, I think!

Idea 4. Being a 'Superhero'.

Having watched 'Kick-Ass', (which was awesome and you all want to see it!) I went home thinking about 'if I was a superhero, what would I call myself?' I came up with the name 'Polly Amorous' and was amazed to discover that this was in fact available as a web domain, so I impulse-bought it and am now considering what to put there. Suggestions welcomed!

Two vaguely serious thoughts followed - one related to my post on being SAMOTURE: that actually, we *are* all responsible for the state of the world we live in, and taking the cop-out option to be bystanders in our own lives... well, it just plain sucks.
From the film: "with no power comes no responsibility... except that's not true."
How does one encourage heroism anyway?

Secondly, that poly people often seem to be considered 'other' by the media in the same way that superheroes are. Every article I read lately seems to include some phrase equivalent to 'this is not for the average Joe', whereas I would protest that we are very much normal people, just normal people with one slightly different belief. I really feel the need to challenge that perception.
So... there will no doubt be related rants, cartoons, essays and other stuff on www.PollyAmorous.com - watch this space!

Idea 5. Boobquake! Today!

Encountered on twitter, details are here: http://www.blaghag.com/2010/04/in-name-of-science-i-offer-my-boobs.html
In the name of science I shall be also be trotting around town this evening wearing the most immodest dress I can, and my lovely housemate [livejournal.com profile] getoffmoiland will be joining me. Pics later!

Join the #boobquake on Twitter! For Science!

Next month looks to be equally busy, so I intend to spend much of next week being a 'hermit', attempting to get some artwork done, and getting a little rest in if I can, as well. I shall be remaining in South London, and not allowing people to entice me into town during the evenings, which are always (annoyingly) the most productive part of my day.

Love to everybody!




*For the hyperobservant of you, yes really. I said academic, not in a physical manner. That came a little later.
emanix: (Default)
My life is a game.
(Subtitle: Why I Haven't Posted Regularly for the Last Few Months)

Good news: Polyday happened.

Bad news: I get sick immediately afterwards

Good news: If it was swine flu, it didn't kill me!

Bad news: I immediately get something else.

Good news: A holiday makes me feel better.

Bad news: Travelling sets me back to square one.

Good news: I finally get around to registering at a doctors surgery.

Bad news: It takes weeks to get a referral.

Good news:Having mastitis (and sleeping 12+ hours a day - twice my normal amount) for two months finally flags up that I have an underlying problem, so I can get it treated.

Bad news: Autoimmune thyroid disease means I'll be on medication for the rest of my natural life.

Good news: The treatment works (and I'm on the way to feeling better).

Bad news: When I finally get referred for an ultrasound exam (for the mastitis), I'm out of the country, so have to wait two weeks extra.

Good news: While I'm away, the mastitis finally clears up on its own.

Bad news: The day I get back I find a lump in my armpit.

Good news: I haven't cancelled the ultrasound appointment.


I guess I'm due some bad news next... Anyone fancy taking a guess?

(If I'm really lucky, the bad news is just that I have to get up early on Monday morning to get to the appointment. Cross fingers for me? )

Hoping my next good news is worth celebrating!

- Maxine.
emanix: (Default)
So I've been overdoing it a bit lately with the socialising. Having barely caught my breath from Polyday and aftermath I was a bit silly over the weekend of [livejournal.com profile] werenerd's party, and did far too much despite having the lurgy. Then I took the chance on travelling to Italy with my love plus close poly family as we'd planned for an extra birthday treat, in the hope that sitting in 'hot ponds' (volcanic spa pools) on the island of Ischia would help me recuperate. It did, but travelling back again set me back by about the same amount, so in health terms I guess it wasn't worth it. Ischia is beautiful, though, and the volcanic spa thing is wonderful, so I'm glad I went.

The party itself was wonderful - [livejournal.com profile] weegoddess wrote a lovely account on her journal, including the couple of miracles that got her there. Masses of fun, affection and cuddles were had by everyone, especially the birthday boy, and several of us as a result decided to start a 'cult'. Check out the Order of the Wand - a virtual temple dedicated to the pleasures of the Hitachi Magic Wand. Join us!

Apparently today is 'Coming out day'. Like a lot of people on my friends list, I had many comings out - the first one to my friends, and brother, about being bi when I was roughly 14, the most recent actually to my parents a couple of weeks ago, having decided I was only going to tell them about being bi, poly, kinky etc. when it was 'relevant' - and up til I was running Polyday none of it really was, though I think they had a fair idea about most of it already on an unofficial basis. I'd never gone out of my way to hide it, it just hadn't been an active enough part of my life to be worth telling them about (sadly).
To their credit, my parents took it really well, especially considering my dad's previous history of crass/homophobic comments, and have now met all of my partners (including my 'half girlfriend' which I hadn't planned on, but she happened along at the right moment). Not that I needed it, but apparently they actually approve.

I officially came out as a geek in 2007, though I don't think anyone was surprised.

Also today I found my first couple of grey hairs. Since the hair on my head is dyed pink, of course the first place they show up is my pubes. I'm 27, do I now need to come out as an old fogey already?

I'm taking it easy at home for a few days now, with the hope of finally beating the bugs (and if I'm up to it, catching up on work), so won't be out socialising much. Next big party, Halloween - I damn well hope I'm on top form by then!

M.
emanix: (Default)
Amazing party at the weekend - thanks to everyone who came to help us celebrate [livejournal.com profile] werenerd being a year older. Also apologies to anyone I gave my lurgy to - I think I warned you all before leaping into the cuddle puddle, but still, it's not being too fun at the moment lugging my tissues around everywhere!

Now flying to Italy at stupid o clock in the morning (see time stamp) to continue very small celebrations with close poly family. Sadly this means missing getting spanked by the lovely Midori, but it does mean recuperating in a volcanic spa. Win some, lose some, eh?

Back next week!

Love to you all!

M.

x
emanix: (Default)
I have long hair. Long hair that is notorious for creeping off my scalp and into surprising places, causing me to suspect that it is, in fact, a separate life-form. It's even a character in my comic strip.

When I'm in the shower, I tend to catch any strands of hair that come loose, and stick them to the shower screen*, thus preventing them from causing mischief. Sometimes, in a rather tea-leaf like fashion, I find them making recognisable pictures or symbols.

So last week, I noticed the shape of a woman with long hair, or possibly a headscarf (a religious person might have said the virgin mary, but I'm not one of those). She looked at me a little wistfully, from shoulder-height, like this:



I might have forgotten about this completely, except a couple of days after that, I look back to where the figure was, expecting it to have gone, but no - not only is the female figure more obvious than ever, but now she's dancing.



Of course it's a chance event, but it made me smile so much, I just had to share it.



*I get away with this since I'm currently lucky enough to have a bathroom to myself most of the time.
emanix: (tea)
I've been busy. Crazy busy. Sorting out Polyday and moving house, and everything all happening at once, and I'm not sure quite when I'll have a regular net connection again - we're due to be connected on wednesday, with a bit of luck!

Just a quick post to say yay for all of my boys - the joy of poly when it's working well really hit home today. I had that chat with A who was on a date over the weekend, and we made it up fine, and today he was driving the van for myself, Werenerd and Misterfallen. They've been the most fantastic team a girl could imagine moving house with, and despite my being a bit of a wuss (for which I forgive myself, as my last half dozen moves have been major horror stories) it's been the least stressful moving day I've ever experienced.

Went out with Misterfallen last night to see Waiting for Godot, and picked up a Moomins lollipop for my girl-sweetie, snork-maiden, too (if you can't tell by the name, she's a big fan!) I'm looking forward to presenting it to her, hopefully at our housewarming on Sunday. If I've forgotten to invite anyone please let me know - the plan is a barbecue at our new place in South London on Sunday afternoon.

Yay again for my boys! I love you all :) 

M.
emanix: (twotone)
So I'm all on my own in the house, let myself get tired and hungry which is never a great way to deal with things, but I'm having a hell of a time with the sorting and packing of my stuff, especially with trying to cut it down to a reasonable size.

The old 'if you've not used it in x months' really doesn't work in this case. I'd only just got myself to the point of having unpacked everything that I got back from my psycho ex, and barely starting to sort through it, when the landlords told us they wanted us out. Amid the househunting and being away, and spending a week being ill, I've hardly even been seen my own house since then. Okay, so I did spend an extra two days prevaricating after I had the option, but I so knew it was going to be like this.

Plus there's an awful lot of stuff that I *know* I haven't done in the past year, or even two, like going out dressed up, or taking an exercise class... or anything fun, really, and I don't want to get rid of that all that kit just when I might get chance to start using it again. Blimey I've had a depressing couple of years. Props to me for getting to the end of that tunnel, I say!

How to distinguish between 'I really don't need this' and 'I've learned to live without it' is all the harder since one of the things I seem to have learned to do without is my painting kit... y'know, my career? Do I even remember how to use it? 

I really haven't this much energy right now. So tempted just to burn all of it and start again from scratch, but I have no idea how I'd even start finding replacements for some of this stuff. 

Arrrgh!
emanix: (Default)
On Tuesday evening last week, [livejournal.com profile] werenerd got back from a couple of weeks out of the country. Since I'd been useless with lurgy for most of that time, as well, our to-do list was looking a bit daunting.

Wednesday morning we ran all around south London looking at houses to share with our little gang of lovely people. Amazingly, we found a house.

Thursday we did the same for Polyday venues (the culmination of some excellent research - thanks, lovely venues minion!) - We also found a venue.

Friday we dealt with the paperwork - which included some Torchwood-esque uses of technology* and an insane last-minute dash across the entire width of London to retrieve my passport (of course in that 'safe place' that just happens to be the least convenient one possible) and to get a digital copy to the agents, whilst the boys dashed in the opposite direction to make sure the rest of the contracts got signed, and to the right place.

Friday evening we made it, breathless to Alex's house, where we hosted [livejournal.com profile] misterfallen's birthday party (which was lovely) - we even managed to find suitable cake!

Saturday morning I packed a week's worth of clothes, sent my rainbow bikini off to Pride attached to one of my other housemates-to-be (I figured if I couldn't go, at least my gayest item of clothing would) and then headed to the airport to fly to Ireland.

That's a hell of a lot to pack into just under four days - I didn't actually think it was all possible and was expecting to have to cancel my holiday.

I feel thanks are in order, in fact:
To Erich - thanks for being amazingly low stress under pressure.
To Lex for being a brilliant party host, and for being amazingly patient with our plans being up in the air til the last minute.
To Ben - just for being a cute birthday boy, and for wanting to live with us

Right now, I'm conveniently stranded at the edge of nowhere, in Ireland, with no phone signal and only a broadband connection to keep me entertained. Time to rest, recuperate, and polish up my world domination plans - after all, if that's what we can achieve in four days of working together, imagine what we can do in a year!


*Okay, maybe not quite so advanced, but the time pressure was the same! Honestly, I  wish a camera had been rolling to catch me executing an Indiana Jones grab to pick up a pen drive with the necessary software, before powering across town using my mobile as a walkie talkie...  I have never set up a scanner nor repaired a wireless network so fast in my life before, nor answered a mobile call with the words 'uploading now!'. I'm sure at least *someone* would have been proud of me.
emanix: (Default)
To fully understand where I am now, one has to look back to roughly the end of 2006. It was December, and I'd just broken up with the partner I'd been living with abroad. Not badly, really - we're still friends, but I wasn't going to able to carry on living there. So I visited London for a week to see if I might want to live there.
While I was in London, I happened to visit Coffee Cake and Kink, and met two people who I was very strongly drawn to. [profile] lord_don, who has since become my 'adoptive, if slightly incestuous little brother' , and [livejournal.com profile] skibbley who has since become a good, if geographically distant friend, and more than friend.

I moved to London, and had a vaguely stressful 2007, which isn't worth mentioning except for at the start of September 07 I got a note on a social networking site from [livejournal.com profile] werenerd inviting me to Polyday that year, which I failed to read until more than twelve months afterwards.

The first three-quarters of 2008 was even more horrible than the year before, but I don't need to go into that either, apart from to say that my ex-partner Alex was wonderful in looking after me right when I most needed it, and immensely patient with me, and eventually over Christmas I gave in and decided it was worth trying again as partners.

The latter part of 2008 also included me managing to attend my first Polyday, and then a week or two after the event logging into a particular site for the first time in 18 months to discover [livejournal.com profile] werenerd's note inviting me to LAST YEAR'S event. Sheer amusement prompted me to reply, which grew into a conversation after we realised we had mutual friends.
Chance, and [livejournal.com profile] skibbley led me within the same week to a 'Critical Sexology' seminar, at which I met [livejournal.com profile] snork_maiden, and also another very cool lady, [livejournal.com profile] werenerd's... well she's currently his other partner.

Fast forward a few months, to the start of April, and that's when all this stuff comes in. So Erich ([livejournal.com profile] werenerd) and I are now working together, and a whole lot else besides. Despite my initial nervousness about getting into any new relationships, particularly with a business partner*, we also seem to be... well, madly in love about describes it at the moment. He also introduced me to a whole crowd of polyamorous people, mostly on the activist-y end of the scene (- and thank heavens, I finally have a support network of poly people for the first time in my life!) and to [livejournal.com profile] misterfallen, who snuck in under the radar, *just* as I announced that I had "too many people in my life already".

Not quite three months on, I'm faced with more scary changes.

Well aware that I'm still in the full flush of 'NRE' with all but one of my two and two-half relationships, I'm finding myself looking for a new house, at the same time that [livejournal.com profile] werenerd is looking to build a 'happy poly shared house of joy' that just happens to include [livejournal.com profile] misterfallen, and a couple of other people. It's a shared house, but it's still going to contain at least one, probably two of my new partners - I'd be crazy to move in and not expect drama. Yet it's exactly what I've wanted pretty much my entire life. I've always loved group living, always wanted a big house full of people, want to live with people I know, and preferably love, and my presence provides the critical mass for the house to exist.
Despite all the apparent craziness, I'm relatively sure that it's the right thing to do. E and I have life (and world domination) plans that match amazingly well. We had been talking about creating our little poly-kinky-friendly commune already - it was part of both of our longer term plans, even before we met. Do you run away from what you want, just because it arrives at an odd time?

I'm committed to trying it, drama or no. The scariest bit is that we're spending the majority of the time we need to be house-hunting in separate countries. Out of roughly five weeks to the end of July, he's out of the country for three of them, and I'm away for one of the other two. It's going to be... interesting.

It's getting late, so to finish up for the night, I'm currently counting:
Two jobs
Two and two 'half' relationships, plus a couple of occasional sweeties.
Four houses that I have keys to (including my parents)
A huge list of projects to work on, including one city-wide, and one national level event.
One big upcoming house-move.

I'll explain the jobs and projects bit of that list later, but it's getting late now.

Wish us luck?

* I don't think any business partner has had their references checked *quite* so thoroughly, including speaking to interrogating both ex and current girlfriends.
emanix: (Default)
I have spent May working two jobs, and suddenly counting two and two-half relationships, and building a happy family around that, and not actually spending any time in my own house. It gives one very little time to wurble online. I am back down to only one day job from this week though, so look ahead to more posts, more essays, and exciting news about events I'm suddenly organising.

A recent conversation with an old friend:


"Sorry, can't talk long, we're off out to see a film for C's birthday."

"Who's C?"

"Oh, she's my other partner's other partner's other partner*."

"Um... okay..."


* Actually, she's my other other partner's other partner, too, but they don't see each other very much.

Confused? Hehe, I'm not going to draw any diagrams.


I'll be back soon, with much wordage and exciting news.

x

emanix: (Default)
Well hi there,

I bet you all thought I was never coming back... to be honest, so did I - but what the heck! I'm logged in so I might as well post something while I'm putting off sorting out some financial paperwork (uck).

I want these http://www.castles-carey.co.uk/products.htm - all of them - linked together with giant hamster tubes so I can run and climb and wriggle around with glee in an arboreally lifted paradise.

I also want (in no particular order) a regular income, freedom, love, world peace, ten times more energy, my life savings back (long story), time to paint, and for the world in general to just go away and leave me alone for a bit so I can catch up with myself.

Since I last posted I have lived in Gloucestershire, Cyprus, London, Canada and London again, and visited a couple of other countries besides, become utterly jaded with relationships, particularly with men, and spent about six months supporting two people on the income of one starving artist - which I'm rather proud of, even though the particular other person screwed me up and over and I'm now stuck with a day job again until I can build some safety net back up.

Also for the few of you that don't know I'm now producing a webcomic - 'Jim and Tonic, or the Adventures of Jim the Chaosbunny' - which lives at www.chaosbunny.com - there are plans afoot for books and t-shirts as and when I get chance to put something together.

I'm probably going to get myself another login for livejournal and post a bit more regularly - I'll let you all know what my new page is when (and if) I do though!

M.

xxx

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