Thanks for writing this. (I have little brain for commenting today, but:) I really don't get on well with "you have been bad and I will punish you" as a top or as a bottom. I like "we're going to do this thing together, and it might be really difficult for you to take, but I'm here to help". I don't mind that other people play differently; I don't like people assuming that telling me I'm bad will be OK. It will not be OK - if you tell me I'm bad I'll think you think I'm bad.
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(I have little brain for commenting today, but:)
I really don't get on well with "you have been bad and I will punish you" as a top or as a bottom. I like "we're going to do this thing together, and it might be really difficult for you to take, but I'm here to help".
I don't mind that other people play differently; I don't like people assuming that telling me I'm bad will be OK. It will not be OK - if you tell me I'm bad I'll think you think I'm bad.